Puzzled

So we have all played with puzzles at some point of our childhoods. It is a pretty simple concept right? You find the pieces that match and fit and you carry on from there. It can get complicated but eventually you find all the pieces that fit and you end up with a beautiful or cool picture at the end of the day. You feel fulfilled and like you accomplished something.

So I can see the parallels in life with an everyday puzzle. You find the pieces that fit and match and create a solid, congruent big picture right? And at the end of the day you have a sense of accomplishment. At least you hope so. The only thing with real life is that all the peics that go with your life don't exactly come in a nicely sealed box with the picture of the end result on the cover. On the contrary, not only do you have no idea what the end result is going to look like, no matter how you try and plan and organize and fix, but you also have no clue where to find the pieces. rather some of the major pieces tend to find their way to you instead, at unspecified times and places in your journey. And sometimes it takes a long while for you to figure out if that piece actually fits and works. It could be a relationship you were so certain fit. It could be a job, an apartment, a career choice, a major, a move. The list is endless really.

It is not an easy puzzle, life. It is the most complicated, frustrating exciting and irritating puzzle you will ever have to piece together on your own. The important thing is to make sure that the puzzle piece really fits at the end of the day. It may take some re-working but they have to fit. It is never a good sign when you have to force pieces together. When you try and force two pieces that do no fit together because you are determined to make them fit or you have convinced yourself that they belong even when all the signs are screaming at you that they don't, the inevitable outcome is that one or both of the pieces will be broken bent or torn apart.

I have been trying for two years to fit a puzzle piece into my life that just doesn't seem to fit at all. I have turned it around and around. I have pushed and pushed and I am at the breaking point. My piece is beginning to break. Well, truth be told it has been breaking for a long time but I have ignored it. I wanted it to fit. I prayed for it to fit. I hoped and hoped and wished on a star and fasted and improvised and humbled myself and tried to change. Lol. And all for naught. Because it doesn't fit. In any capacity. I would like it to fit but alas, it was not meant to be.

Sometimes friendships are meant to be brief. Sometimes they were not meant to be at all. And yet we still strive because we generally assume that with friendship you were brought together and you have to work at it and you got along so well for a reason. But sometimes you are only meant to get along for a season. Sometimes you have to know when to fold and walk away from the table and continue your quest to solve the puzzle that is your life with the right pieces that fit. And build the picture that your life was meant to be. It seems rigid and unforgiving I know, but sometimes that is the way it works.

It's pretty puzzling, I know.