I'm so scribbled!

Just took a quiz i saw on Malaika's blog. I am Lydia Bennett from Pride and Prejudice. I dunno how to take that exactly. I haven't watched it, in fact i am on my way out to rent it. I read the book a million years ago but it'll be interesting to see what this Lydia i am suppose to be is like. Hmmmn.

Talked to the best friend a few days ago. Big things have happened. I am soooo glad that i am not the only one going through the crap i went through last year. We are definately soul mates. We live an almost identical life without knowing it until we share our experiences and we did and all i have to say is WOW!!!

Went to the recording studio with the cousins last night. I know i said i would have to rethink hanging out with the boys but then again i had nothing going on and i thought i would implode from boredom. This whole Spring Break nonsense is killing me. Only because so far i have no plans. Hopefully this weekend i'll be in Orlando with Andy. Hopefully.

I digress. So i went to the studio with the boys and laid down another track. Yes boys and girls i have been exploring my musical talent. Well, maybe not. They rap (please do not comment just roll your eyes in silence and move on) and wanted a female voice to do the hooks. Ya. I dunno where they got the notion that i sing for anyone other than my showerhead, but they did and i thought it would be fun and obliged. So last week we did one song and last night we tried the next one. Disaster. It sucked eggs. The rap was not working, i thought i sounded like a strangled chicken but as usual they said i am too hard on myself and that i sounded great. I think they were just utilizing that inherently male mechanism that makes them say things they think girls want to hear. They can't help themselves so no use getting your knickers in a twist about it, just accept it and move on right? Anyway i thought it was an interesting night, was there from nine until after one in the morning. Ya. I really should learn not to hang out with the boys. But they are so adorable, i don't know how not to.

So apparently Sade is mood music for me in the sense that i really have to be in the mood for it. I am listening to it now and it is giving me a migraine. I love Sade, but i suppose my head is not in a place where i can handle all that right now.

My birthday is coming up in two days and i dunno how i feel about it. Dad's birthday is on Monday and he is going to be 49. I am having trouble with that. With my parents aging. I don't like it one bit. They look like they are in their thirties but the fact of the matter is they are getting older. I am getting older. Why the hell can't things stay the way the are?

Another thing that is bothering me about my impending birthday is the fact that i do not have so much as a prospect for a relationship in the wings or anywhere in the vicinity. I don't care what kind of female it makes me, but i want one damnit. I really really really really really really really want a man. I am disgusted at myself for writing that and letting that escape from the cages of my pride but i do.

Ok, Sade is really getting to me now. I need to listen to something not as heavy right now.

I just put in my "sounds of the rainforest" cd. What is wrong with me? I don't know exactly but all this time with nothing to keep me preoccupied (u know. aside from all the tests and projects and assignments i have due first thing next week. but they don't count because as a chronic procrastinator, they will get done when it is absolutely necessary.) is driving me crazy. I...like....have to think now. And that is never good, when i get to thinking.

Oh dear, i need to stop. I need to get out of here.